Spring break is finally here. We won't be doing much and I actually will be working two days, but it is so nice that we have a week of rest. Friday night we went to winter jam. Total chaos! Seats go so quickly, but thankfully Josh and Wes ran ahead and up to the second level and was able to grab us seats. My favorites were Lauren Daigle, Matthew West, Sidewalk Prophets and King and Country.
Sometimes you hit a curve ball in life. I have to say this has been the most difficult month I have had in a long time. I can't tell you how many tears I have shed. I can't begin to tell you the hurt we have felt. It has gotten a little easier, but the reminders are constantly there. It is something that will be continual reminder. While I don't understand why this has happened I know that God is still God and I have to let him be that instead of trying to make it right on my own, even when it is constantly "thrown into my face". One of the first songs I thought of for some reason was the words to the updated "Just as I am" which says " I come broken to be mended, I come wounded to be healed, I come desperate to be rescued, I come empty to be filled, I come guilty to be pardoned by the blood of Christ the Lamb and I'm welcomed with open arms praise God, just as I am" What was ironic is that Monday night we sang this at church (special services). Psalm 56:8 talks about God putting our tears in a bottle. Wow....and then the other song that comes to mind is "when friends betray us, when darkness seems to win we know, the pain reminds us that this is not our home!!" I'm grateful for the love and support of my family throughout this journey. I must admit that it has definitely brought Jack and closer together.
The junior class at Southside is taking a trip to Colorado this summer. It is some type of summit conference for a week. For the first time, Southside had a fundraiser and put on a talent show. I thought this was a clever way to earn money. It was $7 for adults $5 for kids plus they had a concession stand of candy and popcorn. Kids who wanted to participate had to tryout. They had over 50 acts tryout and narrowed it down to 19. Jenna and two of her friends went to the tryout and made it. I was and am so proud of her for trying something new once again. Here are some pictures of her friends. Janelle is in the middle and Neeley is on the end. The video may or may not play but if it does, this was rehearsal. I love the way the girls are swaying in it. They also had spirit week. First day was red/white/blue day, Tuesday was generation day, Wednesday was camo day Thursday was wacky tacky day and Friday was SCS school color day. Jenna won for her class for generation day (80's). I thought she also looked cute for wacky tacky day.
Last night Jenna played her last basketball game of the season. I'm sick because she started and I thought I got it recorded, but I didn't get it started in time and I missed all of it!! The craziness has been insane at times, but I wouldn't trade it and now that the season is over, I'm not sure what we will do with all the time:). She did great for never playing before. It was for sure a learning season for her and she has a lot of growth to do, but she had fun and that is what counts and I am proud of her.
Meanwhile, Chloe just adores her Jacob. I don't know why she adores him so much, but she does.
Are you one to set New Years Goals? I sometimes am. Sometimes I would put my goals in categories.....family, spiritual, health etc. I would get discouraged because nothing would come together or they seemed so out of reach. I didn't really set any goals this year for myself other than to try to lose some of the pounds that crept back on me. I have the exercise part down pat, but it's the eating that I can't seem to control. I have in the last year become an emotional eater. When I get stressed or down, I eat. When things aren't going quite right, I eat. Other times I start right but then I miss a meal and then I over compensate because I get so hungry......like last night......Jenna had a basketball game and by the time I drove her there and watched the game I was famished. My kids and husband love to eat at all hours of the night and for Josh and Jack, they can eat anything at anytime and it not hurt them in the least. Me....I look at something and gain weight. Jack has been the same size or even thinner since the day I met him. Some days I can't make it to the gym because of our schedules and then that throws me off as well.
So, what if any, are your new years goals and how are you doing?
Wow, I can't believe that it has been awhile since my last post. My camera was full of pictures so I thought it was time to unload them and also do a post. Back in October when the boys where on a teen retreat and Jack was out of town, Jenna and I went to see David Jeremiah and also to see Mercy Me. I really enjoyed hearing both of them. Also on my camera has been several shots of Jenna and basketball. She is on the MS team for Southside. There are 6 8th graders, 1 7th grader and 3 6th graders, Jenna being one of them so this is a learning year for her. She doesn't play a lot, but she takes it seriously and is having a lot of fun in the mean time, which is the most important thing. I feel like I am constantly running.....taking her to practices and her games and then Joshua attends all practices for New Life (he actually practices with the team) and the New Life games. I had to get a separate calendar for their games. Sometimes I hate being so busy, but I love to see my kids active in sports and I know they are only here for a little while and I am enjoying every minute of it.
A couple of weeks ago Joshua and I faced a huge disappointment. Joshua loves basketball and has trained every day since summer vacation began for this basketball season. This boy would run, do suicides, jump rope, practice shots for hours, jump from the ground to the top of the picnic table (amazing), lift weights etc. I have never seen him so wanting something. Tryouts were two weeks ago. There were 19 kids trying out and of course, Josh was the shortest. He got in my car on Friday after a week of tryouts and told me he did not make it. The car ride home was full of silence. I wanted to cry for him. Needless to say that weekend was full of silence. I was worried how he would ever bounce back and my heart was full of sadness for him. On Tuesday night he sent me the most beautiful text saying that he loved me and that he knew I was sad but I was doing a great job as a mom and also that he knew it wasn't meant to be. Wednesday he went to class and there was a boy who did make the team who told him he was very surprised that Josh did not make it because he was very good and he was shocked when he found out he didn't make it. Josh got in my car that day and told me "mom, I don't understand, but God has some reason for me not making the team. This boy told me he was shocked that I didn't make it and I know now that I am good enough to be on that team but God has other plans". Wow, that was a turn around. After giving more thought to that Josh decided to take the position of manager for the team. He gets to practice with the team and help with stats and other needs at the games. He knows that he will stay conditioned and learn so much by staying with them and also next year he will better his chances of being on the team. Meanwhile today I read this from the Proverbs 31 ministries. Perfect!! I could have used this two weeks ago, but it still helps me today. May I answer my son is "the one who is right where he should be"
"Whatever you do, do it enthusiastically, as something done for the Lord and not for men." Colossians 3:23 (HCSB) Several years ago, my middle daughter Ashley was flitting around the house singing everything "Annie." Our home was filled with songs, dances, scripts and the proud announcement she was trying out for her middle school’s musical. The day the cast list was posted the singing and dancing and rehearsing of the lines stopped. She hadn’t gotten a part in the play. There was a smile and a quick, "Who cares," that hid a thousand tears daring to come if she said much more. But a few days later, the director requested that Ashley and one of her parents attend the all-cast meeting where Ashley was told she’d been given the job of student director. That sounded exciting until the director explained that job basically meant Ashley would be a behind-the-scenes errand runner for her and the cast. There would be no shining moment. There would be no spotlight. There would be no audience applause for her performance. Just hours and hours of behind-the-scenes work. As a parent, I could see the character building potential. I have done my fair share of behind-the-scenes stuff in life and it helped shape me for the better. But to a middle schooler’s heart who loved to sing and dance, it was hard. We went home that night and Ashley struggled with wanting to drop out. But the next morning, Ashley surprised me by deciding she would embrace this role of serving. And embrace it she did! My mama heart soared as Ashley chose to live out the wisdom of Colossians 3:23, "Whatever you do, do it enthusiastically, as something done for the Lord and not for men." And in doing so, she discovered she had quite the knack for choreography, set design and a keen sense of how to make scenes flow more smoothly. The director quickly found Ashley to be quite capable and turned over many responsibilities to my girl. What once seemed like a huge disappointment became a divine appointment instead. Ashley was born to be a leader. Put her in the right environment to lead, and she’ll thrive. I asked Ashley in the midst of rehearsals what she thought of the whole experience. She beamed and said, "I wouldn’t want to be doing anything else than the role I’ve been given, Mom. I love being the student director. I love it so much." When the curtain fell to the thunderous applause of proud parents cheering for their child’s performance, I couldn’t see my little brown-eyed beauty. But I knew she was probably bossing somebody backstage, and I was clapping like crazy for her out front. I even had a reply ready, just in case the mama sitting next to me leaned over and asked which one was mine. "The one who is right where she should be." Father God, thank You for using all things for my good, even disappointment. Help me to look at my disappointments with fresh eyes today, discovering gifts where I am tempted to only see heartache. And show me how I can love and serve others with passion and purpose — right where I am. In Jesus’ Name, Amen. TRUTH FOR TODAY: Isaiah 55:8-9: "‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the LORD. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.’" (NIV) Romans 8:28: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (NIV) RELATED RESOURCES: - See more at: http://proverbs31.org/devotions/devo/the-gift-found-in-disappointment/#sthash.s2715c8Z.dpuf
